Brian’sPoems

Searching for a Better Way

I know it’s me,
but it’s also more than me,
this raw feeling
of being overwhelmed,
of not being enough,
and not having enough
to protect myself
from the seemingly random,
and from the certainly arbitrary
slings and arrows
of my life.

The abject neediness
of our human world
oppresses God.
It then transforms
my own unwieldy neediness,
into an unquenchable consumption
and a compulsion to attach myself
to someone,
to something,
to anything,
just so I am seen,
just so I know
my gifts can be given
and will be readily accepted.

It’s exhausting,
and I’ve never found success
in satisfying my needs and feelings
except through shrinking my world
to the bare minimum
while I wander in the wilderness,
forever searching for a better way
to live my life.